Grunthos the Flatulent

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Grunthos the Flatulent was the poetmaster of the Azgoths of Kria, writers of the second worst poetry in the universe, coming between the third, the Vogons, and the first, Paul Neil Milne Johnstone (in the radio series) or Paula Nancy Millstone Jennings (in the other versions).

The guide recites a tale of how, during a reading of his poem Ode To A Small Lump Of Green Putty I Found In My Armpit One Midsummer Morning, "four of the audience died of internal hemorrhaging and the president of the Mid-Galactic Arts Nobbling Council survived only by gnawing one of his own legs off".

Reportedly "disappointed" by the reception of his poem, Grunthos then prepared to read his 12-book epic, My Favourite Bathtime Gurgles (or Zen And The Art Of Going To The Lavatory in the TV series). He was prevented from doing so when his small intestine leapt up his neck and throttled his brain in a desperate bid to save humanity, killing him.